Me, Myself and Martha

Archive Entry

My Martha is the best wife a soldier could have. Each day, she stands upon the porch of our hut, waiting for me to return from the jungle.

EVERY DAY AND ANOTHER DAY AND A DAY

In the evenings, she stands as still as a statue, looking out to sea from our watchtower and listening to me rant about the crabs not taking their bait or the sharks circling the shallows. She’s the perfect companion that way.

UNLIKE THE COMPAGNIE BASTARDS WHO LEFT ME HERE

And don’t get me started on her good looks! Miam miam (Yumyum)! Her skin is caramel and fibrous, with her round and plump. The other day, she got a little cross with me when I used her favourite white dress to light a bonfire to signal a passing ship.

THEY JUST DON’T SEE YOU THE WAY I DO

And for dinner, all I have to do is sit at the table, crack open our skull, and spoon out her succulent white flesh –

AND SLURP HER SWEET, SWEET JUICES FROM THE INSIDE

My Martha is truly the sweetest